13Aug/15

Who Am I??

Its happened, I have truly turned into my parents…

Stop it now...

Stop it now…

 

I don’t know when or how this happened, but it happened. I find myself saying and doing things they did all the time now. Daily, hourly, every few minutes… I just can’t stop it. I want to but I can’t. I have turned into my parents!!

How this is affecting my life and the lives of those who love me (at least they did, maybe not so much anymore) has not been determined yet. But it is affecting them and me. I promise myself to try harder to stop being my parents. But can I?

My my youngest daughter and grandkids are visiting from Vermont this week and I find myself acting like my Dad constantly. Saying things like “turn out that light, stop running in and out the front door, calm down, shut the refrigerator door, do you have to be so loud, you’ll poke your eye out”…and on and on. The words just come out of my mouth and the moment I say them I hear him and want to stop but I can’t.

I wasn’t always like this, I was a fairly normal person for the most part and allowed the kids to be kids, but I have sadly turned into Dad and I can’t go back. Mom wasn’t as bad as Dad. My Father was the one who had no patience at all with kids. That is until I had kids, he was pretty good with them and actually talked to them, I don’t remember ever having a conversation with him unless he was telling me NOT to do something or to lower my voice. I couldn’t do anything right. I tried to be different with my kids, I left them be kids. I wasn’t like this when they were little..or at least I don’t think I was.

Dad did however have his limits, even with my kids. I remember both of my daughters telling me of one particular night they slept over at my parents house, they had been to the mall and each of them got a balloon. They were being kids and playing with the balloons and had named them “Buster”(they got them at the Buster Brown Shoe Store). Of course they were giggling and running around the house with them until Dad just couldn’t take it any longer,  he got up from the sofa went over and ripped the much loved Buster from their tiny little hands and threw them out. I always thought this was such a horrible story. That is until recently. I could so see myself doing this…and maybe even have done something similar.

So I ask, is this normal? Or is something wrong with me? Or could it be due to the fact I have been through so much lately that I have absolutely no patience for anything that is out of my ordinary daily routine? I have had so much chaos, craziness and loss in my life that now I seek peace, calm and a semblance of order. I am not making excuses, I am just saying this is the way it is.

And by the way, this isn’t just happening with my grandkids, I am even doing it with my oldest kid who has moved in with me. I find myself on a daily basis telling her to turn off the light or shut the refrigerator door. She just looks at me and I know what she is thinking. I also yelled at my youngest daughter the other night for jumping around in bed. I thought she was going to have a heart attack. Of course I feel bad after I do these things, but for some reason I just can’t stop myself.

Again I pose this question to you, is this normal? Do you find yourself having less patience as you turn older? Do you find yourself saying and doing more things like your parents? Please tell me I am not alone or crazy!

Are we destined to turn into our parents?

 

 

06Aug/15

There’s No Place Like Home..

Even if it isn’t your home anymore

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The house I grew up in..

 

I drove by the house I grew up in last week and as it always does these days, it made me sad. I’m sad my parents don’t live there. I’m sad someone else is living in “my house”, enjoying my yard and sleeping in the room I grew up in with my sister.

My parents built this house in 1949, the year I was born. They lived in it their whole married life. I was born in this house. How can this not be our house anymore? I sit out front and stare at it now and wonder if the family inside is enjoying it as much as we did. I am also silently hoping I don’t get arrested for stalking or something.

I have such wonderful memories of my youth and growing up in this house. We had our whole family together here every major holiday. There would be picnics outside in the summer where Dad would cook on the grill and Thanksgiving and Christmas Mom would do her thing in the kitchen. Family meant the world to my parents and they included everyone in these celebrations. Oh, what I would give to have one again.

I love thinking back to the days when we played outside in the back yard or roller skated down the sidewalk. Everyone in the neighborhood knew each other and if you misbehaved someone let you know it wasn’t acceptable or told your Mother. And you didn’t want that so you behaved. We were outside from morning until dark. My first friends were all from the neighborhood and we were always together. All different ages, it didn’t matter. We made up games and things to do and we were never bored. Sometimes we would just lay in the grass at dusk and look at the stars until our parents made us go back inside for the night. Then we hooked up cans on string and threw it across the window to the house next door so we could continue our conversations.

I think of all of this as I sit there staring at “our” house. I can picture us running around the neighborhood or riding our bikes. Speaking of bikes, I remember the little girl across the street getting her foot caught in the spokes of my bike an having to go to the hospital. See Mom was right, you shouldn’t let anyone ride on the back of your bike. I also remember when the meat truck would pull up out front and Mom had me go out to get our lunch meat. I also remember one such time after looking both ways and seeing not a car in sight, getting struck by a car and having to go to the hospital. I was 5 and believe me, I was a super star when I went back to school with the story of getting thrown 20 feet in the air and surviving with just a few scratches.

My own kids don’t have this. I have moved so many times in my life it it ridiculous. so there isn’t that one place they can look back on and say it was their home. I bought the house I live in now so that our family can be together and have a place to call “home.”  But what is a home? The dictionary defines it as this..”the place where one lives permanently, especially as a member of a family or household. Permanently..see even the dictionary thinks it should be permanent.

I miss this house and everything it meant to me. I hold all of those memories in my heart now of course, but I would love to be back inside that place one more time. One more time with my family all together. One more time.

Do you still live in your family home? Would you if you could?

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Me and some of the neighborhood kids.

“There’s no place like home” ~ Dorothy

 

 

 

 

30Jul/15

Shake It Up!

Do something different, it’s good for you..

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No, I’m not talking about drinks…but you could do that as well. What I’m talking about is doing something different. Shaking things up in your life and doing something you have never done before.

The other day I was supposed to meet a friend for lunch. I thought we would just go to one of the usual places. Don’t get me wrong, I love those spots and the food is always good. But she suggested we go somewhere different, somewhere I have never even heard of. Boiling Springs. It’s in Pennsylvania and I am from PA so how have I never been there or never even heard of the place is beyond me. She asked if I had time and I did, so off we went to Boiling Springs.

There is nothing that clears your mind like going somewhere you have never been before. While the same old places are quite rewarding and you know what to expect and most of the time are not disappointed, it is refreshing to boldly go where you have never gone before. I was excited…to go to lunch. Going to places from my youth is comforting and I love that feeling but going somewhere new is exciting. And I don’t get a lot of excitement these days.

The place where we ate was beautiful. It sits on the banks of the Yellow Breeches Creek and the water is indeed, well… boiling. It isn’t boiling from temperature but thats another story. Look it up. The food was excellent and service was great, and I thoroughly enjoyed both the lunch and the conversation. But I have to say what really blew me away was the town itself. It truly captured my heart and soul. We drove around to check it out and it was such a quaint, old fashioned little town it looked like it hadn’t changed in decades, but in this instance that is a good thing. Every street we drove down was more engaging than the one before. I could totally picture myself living in one of the cottages by the water and walking around there every morning.

This little trip touched me in such a way that it boggled my mind.  So I was thinking about this and the fact that it was still on my mind at all. And I think the reason is because it made me break away from the norm, from the usual and mundane. It “shook things up” a little. So, because of this I gave myself a challenge, a challenge to visit somewhere new at least once a month. I think we all need that, we need to feel the way we did as children every time we did something new and the world was full of wonder and excitement. It was so nice to feel that way again. We tend to get stuck in our lives by going the same places for dinner, the same spot for vacation and even the same place to shop.

Maybe I won’t limit it to new places, maybe new things as well. One new place and one new thing every month. Why not? What can it hurt? I’m not saying it is wrong to go to the old familiar places and I certainly will continue to do that, but I want to have this feeling again and I want have it often.

In a world full of such negativity and this “growing older” thing that is also happening, I want to find things to make me feel the way I felt the other day. Wouldn’t it be great to have exciting new things and places to experience? They wouldn’t have to be expensive or far away. This place was not far at all and so worth the trip. Really you wouldn’t even have to leave the house to do some things. You could learn a new language, a new skill or craft, a new food or even just read a different kind of book(say you always read fiction, now you would try non-fiction). My son and his wife changed their living room furniture around last week and even the kids felt the difference.

Change is good for us. It can be scary and uncomfortable, but it forces us to grow and look around at what else is out there. It makes us think and makes our brain work harder. So lets “Shake it up.” Let’s embrace each and every moment we are here and get excited again. What are you going to try? Where are you going to go? Let me know, I might want to go there too!

“Shake it up, people!”

23Jul/15

“Shop Till You Drop”

Or run out of money…

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As far back as I can remember I have loved to shop. It all began sometime in the early 50’s, Mom would take me and then me and my sister Rhonda downtown every Friday night. We would go to the Bon Ton Tea Room for dinner and “shop till we dropped”. Then happy and fulfilled and loaded down with shopping bags, we would head home on the bus. Thus began my love of shopping.

It still continues, this obsession with shopping. It is my therapy. My thing. Everyone has something, I have shopping. I absolutely love it. I know there are a lot of people who hate shopping, but I’m sure they have something like it in their lives. I have friends these days that get a box full of items sent to them with tops, bottoms and accessories all in the box. Bam! Everything you could possibly need in one box. But what’s the fun in that? Half the fun is in the find! You can quote me on that one.

I usually go with someone, a friend or my daughter. It’s more fun with someone, it’s a social thing. And you have someone that can either talk you out of or into buying something, We got this love of shopping from Mom, it’s her fault we spend. She didn’t  drink, smoke or play cards or anything that women from her day did, she shopped. And she loved it. She passed that love onto me, my sister Rhonda, my nieces and my daughters and now even my grand daughter. My youngest daughter isn’t as obsessed as the oldest and myself, but she does have her moments. They just aren’t as frequent as ours.

Since I am not working I don’t have the excuse of needing new outfits for work. I am trying to simplify and declutter. So the whole shopping thing is not nearly as much fun. When you don’t have an excuse and also don’t have as much money you have to look for a new way to enjoy your “therapy.” My new plan is to carry the items I find and love around the entire time I’m in the store, enjoy it, picture myself wearing it and then put them back before leaving the store. I pretend I am buying them and don’t actually spend the money. It is working so far. I’ve only tried it one time…

Buying things you don’t need or don’t really have the money for is stressful. The short term thrill isn’t worth the depression or regret later. I have been thinking about this since I recently saw an article about “why we have the need to shop”. A few clinical psychologists have done research and found that reason we shop and buy things is a need for a social connection or relationship in one form or another. Also it is known to be a form of anxiety relief. Someone going through a crisis or life transition will shop to release the tension and stressors. (at least until the bill comes due)

The same doctors or whatever they were, went on to say that shopping can be addictive.(duh) And they saw spikes in dopamine activity in the group they were testing. It is especially so when it comes to bargain hunters and events like Black Friday sales. So at least I have a reason and a good one at that, for my love of shopping. It is somewhat comforting to know I have a clinical affliction and therefore can’t help myself from buying that new purse.

It isn’t just women who love to shop, while they are probably the ones that do it the most, there are a lot of men who love to shop too. They just shop for different things…cars, tools, car parts and many kinds of collectable items, like old baseball cards. My son loves tools and would buy them every day if his wife would let him. Seriously..tools?

I also read that successful people wear the same thing every day. Einstein wore grey suits. Steve Jobs wore a black turtleneck. And Mark Zuckerberg wears a tee shirt and jeans every single day. Notice there were no women on this list, I guess it must be a “man thing.” They really have no need to shop and can easily pick items from their closets each morning without stressing about “what to wear.” Again, what’s the fun in that?

And so I’m simplifying and decluttering and not buying as much(well not quite as much). The getting rid of things part is a whole other thing and hard. How do I get rid of that leather jacket I wore to the Aerosmith concert? But, I’ll tell you one thing, I will not give up shopping. You will see me, a little old lady on my scooter, scooting around Walmart, shopping till I drop. On second thought….no, I just can’t do Walmart, no matter how old I am. It will have to be TJMaxx.

Ok, I’ll admit it… my name is Renee and I’m a “Shopaholic”….

 

09Jul/15

“Oh No, Not You Too”…..

Can we get a button on Facebook to “not” see certain things….

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The button I am talking about and what I would so like to have is one to not see my “friends” posts on political issues. I have made many new friends over the years I have been on Facebook and I really love the interaction. I am all for people having their own opinion and being able to express it. The problem I have is when a person I really have come to admire and think we are “like minded” posts something hateful or very biased and one sided about a political figure or topic. It just makes me say to myself (and sometimes out loud), “oh no, not you too.”

In “real life” I don’t know how most of my friends feel about politics or even what party they belong to. We don’t discuss politics. My Dad always said if you want to keep a friend you don’t discuss politics or religion. So I don’t have these discussions with friends or family members with the exception of my 3 kids. We all know where we stand and respect each others opinions. I do know the brands of clothing, purses and shoes my friends like but not their favorite politician.

Just this week a person I had respected and have had conversations on various topics posted something that made me say…”oh no, not you too.” It is very  disheartening to see the hurtful and sometimes hateful comment coming from someone you have respected for so long. It changes the way you look at them and changes the way you feel. At least it does for me. It is one thing to post a comment and quite another to be so overly hateful or even abusive.

I never post anything about politics and never engage in conversation about it. It brings out the worst in people and I don’t want to see that or be that person. My question is, do these people act like this in the “real world” or do they only do it when they are behind the safety of their computer screen? I have a few people I am friends with that are or have been politicians and I know where they stand and I respect that. I don’t try to change them or say hurtful things to them. They have their belief and I have mine. We agree to disagree, without saying a word.

This is what I think it all boils down to…people all want us to think the way they do. What happened to everyone having an opinion and talking about it rationally and with out judgement or hate? I don’t see the need to trash someone, be it a political figure or anyone else for that matter. Why can’t we just have a conversation? Does the internet give you some kind of super power to say things you would never say if you were at dinner with friends?

We still have the right to free speech in our great country. I am grateful we have it and think we should speak our mind… It just doesn’t have to be hurtful, hateful or abusive. Believe me it takes all the will power I have sometimes not to say something, but just as in “real life” I don’t. Lesson learned, Dad! And those that know me, know this is hard for me as I have an opinion on everything. To all the people that feel the need to speak out… go ahead have your say, but if it is one of hate or abuse, I really don’t want to see it.

Please give me that “I don’t want to see this” button……

 

 

 

02Jul/15

10 Benefits of Sesame Oil

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Why I love this stuff…

Apple Cider Vinegar, as many of you may know, is my number one go to cure all. Sesame Seed Oil is number two on my list for a variety of reasons. Today I will talk about the top 10.

1. Sesame Seed Oil has a high zinc content which makes it great for your skin. It has healing properties and produces collagen. Making it wonderful as a moisturizer and as a massage oil.

2. The seeds contains high levels of magnesium which has been known to prevent and help with some diseases such as diabetes and high blood pressure. Also contains copper which can help those with rheumatoid arthritis.

3. Sesame seeds contain calcium, tryptophan and thiamin, which have calming effects and can help with pain, anxiety, depression and sleeping issues.

4. The oil has been shown to help improve the liver. Need I say more?

5. The healing properties of this seed are numerous as I mentioned above. Because of the zinc and it’s antioxidant properties it can prevent wrinkles, help with psoriasis and may lighten age spots. Start as early as possible using this, I have seen some of my age spots lighten a bit. I just wish I would have found this “wonder oil” sooner.

6. The oil can be used as a facial cleanser. It has amazing detox and healing properties due to the zinc and is very easy to make.

Mix together 1/2 cup sesame seed oil and 1/2 cup Apple Cider Vinegar(if you don’t know about all the wonderful things ACV does, please read my earlier post on that) Throw some water on your face first and then use this mixture, leave on for a brief moment and then wash with warm water and your regular soap or cleanser.

7. It heals cuts, scrapes and helps with skin problems such as acne, which has a tendency to pop(no pun intended) up again later in life. Also tightens skin and stops itching. There has been some studies done where it has helped skin cancers or at least prevented it. I hesitate to promote this, as I do not know this to be a fact. But it can’t hurt.

8. Sesame oil is great for sunburn and after a day in the sun. Massage it gently all over your skin. One thing I like about it is it is not very greasy and doesn’t rub off on clothing or sheets like some other oils. (do not yell at me if you use too much and you ruin something)

9. I personally use it every morning as a serum under my moisturizer. I have noticed my skin getting softer and dry patches I had have disappeared.

10. And last but not least it works wonders on dry, cracked heels. Believe me when I say I have tried all the “cures” over the years and this is the best. Rub some on your feet every night, put on some socks and voila in the morning.. soft feet. It takes a few weeks to see the improvement but it is much better than the smelly Vicks or some of the other horrible things I have tried.

This list shows you a few of the benefits of Sesame Oil. You can also use the oil in cooking instead of vegetable oil. It has healthy fats and does not burn as quickly as some other oils. Make your salad dressing with it or just throw some seeds in your normal recipes. If you are making bread or cake throw some seeds in and no one will even notice(well they might, but its good for them). You can put some in your smoothies.

Note: I am not a doctor, nor do I pretend to be one. This works for me and I share my stories on what I use in hopes it may help others. If you take medication and think something may interact, please check with your doctor before trying anything I suggest. Good luck and good health!

I have provided a link to the one I use for my skin. Just click on the picture and it will take you to Amazon to purchase it. I always search for the best cost and best brand with highest rating from other users.

 

 

 

 

 

25Jun/15

I’m Offended…

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Are you offended by this cat? Maybe you like dogs and cat pictures offend you. Maybe you don’t like the cat sticking its tongue out. Whatever the reason, if you are, my advice is this..”get over it.”

Why is everyone so overly offended these days about literally everything? And also why do we rush to change whatever is offending them so they won’t be offended by it ever again. Until the next thing comes up that offends them.Yes, I know I used the word “offend”.. a LOT(and you will continue to see it even more). But there certainly are a lot of things offending people for some reason.

Who are all these people that get so upset over just about anything? When did we create a nation of people that are so self important that their opinion is the only “right” one? And then the offending thing is removed from existence so the people who were not offended can never have it again.. And many times it is one person who it bothers causing millions of others to be left wondering what happened. Where is the freedom in this? Why does one person get to have their way at the expense of others?

But it happens, and more and more all the time. If someone is upset over something, by all means let’s get rid of it all together. I guess I was raised in a different time, a time when if we were upset with something we were told to just deal with it. And we did and we moved on. It didn’t become a national issue and we didn’t have to get rid of said item. It wasn’t forever banished from the face of the earth.

For those wondering, I am not speaking to the recent “items” that are in the news this week. This trend didn’t just start today, it goes back many years. I think my first time dealing with it was while working at a major department store when I was told not to say “Merry Christmas” to the customers because “we may offend someone”. I was literally blown away by this. Who was I going to offend by telling them to have a “merry” whatever?

I myself am offended by a lot of things. I’m offended by having to be so politically correct and being absolutely afraid to say certain things without someone getting upset. I’m offended that we have to put warnings about how “hot” the coffee is on a coffee cup. I’m upset that kids can’t play cowboys anymore. I’m concerned that kids playing at a park down the street may cause their parents to be put in jail. I am upset by things and people but I am not calling for all things to be my way. I have to learn to live with the way things are today. Some people just can’t do that. These people are offended by items, books, religion, different people, logos and even food. One person doesn’t like the box the cereal comes in and we can’t get that cereal anymore.

And on and on it goes..why can’t we just “let it go?” More importantly why can’t we just forgive those who made the mistake in the first place. And really, if we want to be offended by something, let’s make it something important. Let’s be offended by hunger, poverty and homelessness. And better yet, let’s do something about it. Things that offend us go away very quickly these days so maybe if we are offended by the right things, something will get accomplished to rid us of these horrible things. A little love, compassion and forgiveness can go a long way towards a possible solution to the problems we face today. It is certainly better than the alternative and most definitely better than being offended by everything we see.

Hey, hope I didn’t offend you….

19Jun/15

“Top 10 Things You May Or May Not Know About Me”

Just a fun blogpost of things about me…

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1. My favorite car that I ever owned was my green 1966 MGBGT. I loved that car. It cost a mint in upkeep but I still loved every moment of owning and driving it. I didn’t get it until the 80’s but I sure got all the fun I could out of the years I had it. I would pile all 3 of my kids in that little hatchback area and off we would go on our adventures. We had some great times in that car. Couldn’t do that now…

2. I have had every job from waitress to restaurant manger. From working at a jewelry store to owning a women’s fashions and jewelry store in downtown Frederick. I owned my own store for 4 wonderful years. I had to close it in 1991 when the bottom fell out and 20 some other stores closed as well as mine. It was one of the saddest days of my life. It was truly one of the best, if not the best “jobs” I ever had. I had always wanted to have my own clothing store and I did it, even if it was only for a little while.

3. I have been married twice to the same man. I have gotten divorced twice to that same man.

4. The guy I was married to was 2 years older than me but every other guy I dated was at least 10 years younger than me. I lived with one guy for 9 years and he was 11 years younger than me. What can I say, I liked younger guys..

5. I got pregnant at 15, 3 months shy of my 16th birthday. It was not an easy time, you didn’t get pregnant and stay in school like they do today. My friends were going to prom and I was in the hospital giving birth to my daughter. I wouldn’t have traded places with them for anything.

6. I had all 3 of my children by the time I was 23. We grew up together. I for the most part raised them by myself. Sometimes working 3 jobs to take care of the bills and to get them the things they needed. Sure, I made mistakes and maybe wasn’t there as much as I should have been, but I did the best I could. There was no manual that came along with the whole single parenting thing. Their father chose not to be involved in their lives when they were all still fairly young. Again I would not change any part of having these 3 wonderful kids in my life. They give me a reason to get up in the morning. We have had our ups and downs but we love each other unconditionally…and in our book..Family is forever.

7. I moved to Maryland from PA 30 years ago. I needed a change after the second divorce and needed there to be some distance between us. My live in boyfriend at the time got transferred to MD with his job and I decided to go with him. I have never regretted for one moment my decision to move here. I love it here. I am close enough to my friends and family as I am only an hour away. I moved from Frederick to Thurmont 7 years ago when I wanted to be a little further out in the country. I also have always wanted a big “old” house. Mine was built in 1890.

8. My first journey into entrepreneurship was at the age of 12. I wanted a dog, a poodle to be exact. My parents said I couldn’t get one unless I paid for it. I did babysit but that didn’t get me even close to the amount I needed so I talked the neighborhood kids into donating money to my cause. They all did, much to their parents chagrin. But somehow I got my poodle. I just had to have that kind of dog for some reason and now I don’t even like that breed.

9. I am sure most people know this one..I have curly hair. Naturally curly hair, way to curly for my liking. I have ironed it, I have straightened it. I have cut it short and let it grow very long. I even wore a wig in the 70’s when that was the rage. It was straight. I loved it. Nothing I ever did has changed it. Everyone said, “just wait until you have kids, it will get straight.” Well I am here to ditch that myth. I had 3 kids and my hair is curlier than ever. If anything it is curlier than it was when I was younger. Maybe I will get another wig or cut it very short and be done with it.

10. And last but certainly not least, I have always wanted a place at the beach, by the water. After all the recent hurricanes and bad weather I have revised that dream somewhat. I still long for that beach house but my beautiful view of the mountains will suffice for now. At this point of my life I have many friends who live close to a beach. I  will visit them.

Oh, and one last thing…I absolutely hate the white thingys in eggs…

 

 

12Jun/15

“Memories”

“Pressed between the pages of my mind”….

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The title of this post is a song by Elvis Presley (for those of you too young to remember) and it sums up the way I have been feeling lately. It seems like everything I see, hear or smell these days reminds me of something or someone from my past.

Last week I wrote about how everything we did back in the “good old days” seemed better. And I asked the question, “were they really better or were we just missing the people who are no longer with us.” I still don’t know the answer to the question but it brought up some other things to think about. Memories.

The memories I am talking about today are the ones caused by a certain smell or something as simple as seeing kids playing on the beach. I saw lots of them on our recent trip to Chincoteague this past week. Families holding hands and jumping over the waves together. I was instantly taken back to the days when my kids and I went to OC, MD and we were playing in the water and jumping the waves. The memories all came flooding back and a few slipped down my cheeks.

It seems I can’t get through a day when something I do or see doesn’t remind me of a memory from my past. I have always had some of these moments but now they seem to happen more frequently. Sometimes they make me smile and sometimes they make me sad. And don’t even get me started on music…a song can instantly take me back to a different time and place. Some of those moments are forever etched in my mind but you will have to wait to hear about them.

The reason for all these flashbacks to a simpler time could be that I now just have more time in my day to reminisce. When the kids were little I was so busy trying to just get through each day that I didn’t have time to simply enjoy the moment. This is no excuse, but I think we get so caught up in life and are so stressed trying to provide a home and get everything done that has to get done we are just too tired to enjoy the little moments along the way.

I also think as we age we learn to appreciate things we once took for granted. When you are young you have the sense that you are invincible and that things will always be the same. But things do change, buildings are torn down, people move away and we lose those we love. I will see an old house alongside the road and think to myself, that house used to have a family living there, where are they, what happened to them? Were they once happy? Did they enjoy the moments of their life?

All we can do at this point in our lives is make new memories, enjoy each day and keep going forward. We can love those close to us and let them know how important they are. And we can try to make a difference in their lives and make each moment count by spending time with them. Time spent with those we love is the best time of all. And think of it this way, one day in the not too distant future, we will be their memory. Let’s make it a good one.

Someday, many, many years from now, when people reminisce about me I want them to think that I simply made them laugh.

How do you want to be remembered?

“Memories, sweetened thru the ages just like wine, memories, memories, sweet memories.”

 

04Jun/15

“The Good Old Days”

Were they really as good as we remember?

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A day doesn’t go by where I don’t hear someone say, “well, things were better back in the old days.” Or they mention something used to taste so much better when they were a kid. I am as guilty as anyone, I do it myself. Just recently we went to something we had been going to for over 25 years. I couldn’t wait to go again. We were there for a half hour and left. “It just wasn’t the same.”

The picture I have on here is from Atlantic City, NJ. It is me and my dear, sweet sister Rhonda on the boardwalk looking at the pigeons. I posted it in a group I belong to on Facebook just the other day when we were talking about Atlantic City and The Steel Pier. Someone had posted a picture of the Diving Horse and it made me think of this picture. Atlantic City was “the” place to go back when I was growing up. The boardwalk and beach were pristine and my parents took us every year. Now it is a place to go to gamble and instead of seeing a beautiful boardwalk you see closed casinos and stores. “It just isn’t the same.”

Was it better back then? Do I remember it correctly or am I just remembering how wonderful it was because I was with my parents and sister?  Does the fact that all of them are no longer here cloud my thinking? Is it that things have changed or is it the people we are missing?

But what about the food? Oh yes, truly one of the best parts of growing up was the wonderful food. My Grandmothers were both wonderful cooks and I made many cookies and pies with them. One of my favorites were pie. I loved my Grandma Gibbons pecan pie. I was at a diner recently and saw they had pecan pie. It looked just like hers, didn’t look like the stuff you see in the supermarket at all. So I got a piece and couldn’t wait to dig in. “It just wasn’t the same.” It was ok, and of course I ate the entire thing, but it just wasn’t quite the same. Why? Maybe the reason was because I didn’t make it with my Grandma?

Everything changes. I don’t expect everything to stay the same. Time goes on and we are constantly being told that this or that is new and improved. But is it really? Don’t get me wrong, sometimes change is good. I definitely wouldn’t want to be wearing some of the things we wore “back in the day”. I can still feel the pain in my poor feet while wearing my platform heels. Most recently I have been wanting a jumpsuit. I don’t know what made me decide I had to have one, but I saw they were back in style this year and for some reason just had to have one again. I found a really cute one. On sale… So I got it. I forgot why I didn’t like them back in the day when I wore one the first time. You have to take the whole darn thing off to go to the bathroom. And I go to the bathroom a lot more these days..sorry for the TMI…. It is still cute and I will wear it, but I definitely won’t be drinking anything while I have it on.

I can honestly say I don’t know the answer to my question? “Were the good old days really as good as we remember?” And, let’s not forget that someday these very days will be the good old days for someone. What do you think? Are things so terrible today or are we simply missing those people that made the past so great?