Some of the reasons I feel lost..
Wednesday July 20, 2016 my life was forever changed. Losing my son has completely changed my life and it will never be the same. People tell me it\u2019s time to move on. But it\u2019s not that easy. Sometimes are harder than others especially when it\u2019s close to the day he left us. This year was harder than ever for some reason.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Five years ago I moved back to PA where I grew up. I felt like I needed to be home again, hoping to reconnect with my family and friends. But I really don\u2019t see many of them and when I do I feel like I don\u2019t fit in. Most of them are married, and have kids and grands all near by. My youngest daughter lives in VT and 2 of my grands live there too. And her other son lives in MD. My oldest daughter lives close to DC and my son\u2019s two kids live in MD and I rarely see them. Especially my only granddaughter who I haven\u2019t seen in almost two years. I only had one sibling and she passed away in 2014. I miss her so much. She had 2 daughters, my nieces who I was excited to spend more time with, but I rarely see them. I\u2019ve lived in my house for 4 years and they\u2019ve never come to visit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Honestly, I\u2019m not trying to feel sorry for myself, I\u2019m just trying to explain why I am feeling the way I am so you can understand. I so miss my house in MD. I loved my house and it was always filled with family and friends. But I couldn\u2019t live there anymore after losing my son. And I\u2019ve lost so many friends and family members lately and that doesn\u2019t help. I remember my mom feeling so sad that she was losing so many and now I understand how she felt. I just feel lost and I don\u2019t know how to fix that. And please don\u2019t feel sorry for me, I just needed to put it out there so you can understand and I can hopefully move forward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Thank you for your understanding.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Renee, The Hellion<\/p>\n\n\n\n
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