{"id":734,"date":"2018-02-22T17:32:19","date_gmt":"2018-02-22T22:32:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?p=734"},"modified":"2018-02-22T17:32:19","modified_gmt":"2018-02-22T22:32:19","slug":"looking-for-the-perfect-job","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?p=734","title":{"rendered":"Looking For The Perfect Job&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em><strong>I do know there\u00a0isn&#8217;t one&#8230;but I won&#8217;t be taking any of these&#8230;<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_735\" style=\"width: 950px\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\"><a href=\"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/pexels-photo-463684.jpeg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-735\" class=\"size-full wp-image-735\" src=\"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/pexels-photo-463684.jpeg\" alt=\"looking for the perfect job\" width=\"940\" height=\"627\" srcset=\"https:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/pexels-photo-463684.jpeg 940w, https:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/pexels-photo-463684-300x200.jpeg 300w, https:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/pexels-photo-463684-768x512.jpeg 768w, https:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/pexels-photo-463684-600x400.jpeg 600w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 940px) 100vw, 940px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-735\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Waiting&#8230;<\/p><\/div>\n<p>After losing yet another job I signed up for unemployment until I found the &#8220;perfect job.&#8221; This is much like finding the perfect man&#8230;neither one of them exists. I have to enter 3 job contacts on a website they have every week. I have had some weird jobs come up in my searches and they make me laugh. I think to myself..really who is going to do that?? But at least they make me laugh. Some of them make me shake my head and say..what?<\/p>\n<p>Here are some of the ones that I thought were funny or just that I couldn&#8217;t see myself working there and the reasons why&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Delivery driver for Pizza Hut &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>Really.. how do they drive around all day with pizza in their car and not eat it&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Bookseller at Barnes and Noble &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>Ok, I even thought&#8230;wow, this could be fun. And then remind myself&#8230;books. I love to read, I read every night before falling asleep. So could I really work at a place with all those books?? I would be sitting in the corner in the children&#8217;s area reading&#8230;or I would run up to a customer and grab a book they are looking at and say&#8230;DO NOT get this book, it&#8217;s terrible&#8230;.. thinking I could quite possibly get fired the first day on the job.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Bunny at the local mall &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>So you are dressed up in a bunny costume with screaming kids sitting on your lap and pulling on your ears&#8230;for what&#8230;two, three weeks, 8 hours a day&#8230;um, no thanks!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Manager<\/strong><strong> at Walmart &#8211; <\/strong>Um, no!&#8230;nuff said&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>H<\/strong><strong>ousekeeper &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>Daily cleaning, making meals and maybe watching 2 year old several days a week&#8230; just no. I don&#8217;t like doing this at my own house. I know you get paid and all, but they couldn&#8217;t pay me enough to do this.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Ice Cream Scooper at local dairy &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>ok, I think this could be my dream job. But not sure if they would like the &#8220;one scoop for you two for me&#8221; part&#8230; I would have to get it in writing before I would start. And I really don&#8217;t care how much the job pays.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Potato Chip Tester &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>Ok so actually the job description\u00a0is a display setter\/reset specialist&#8230;at least that&#8217;s what they are calling it&#8230;I call it&#8230;all the chips I can eat and get paid to do it!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Barista at Starbucks &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>I actually thought of applying for this, I mean I love coffee. Supposedly they are a good company to work for. And they have coffee&#8230;lots and lots of coffee&#8230;on second thought I don&#8217;t think I could do this. I might not be able to drive home. It&#8217;s bad enough I have a Keurig and can make a cup at home whenever I want, but I have to put the little cup in and press the button and make sure enough water is in the container&#8230;.and all that&#8230;at Starbucks there is always coffee brewing&#8230;Its Starbucks&#8230;Back away from the coffee&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Garden Center Helper &#8211; <\/strong>This could be a fun job, I love looking at plants. But I think you have to actually take care of them&#8230;if they want dead plants then by all means call me. I can look at a plant and its dead the next day. Even air ferns&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Manager at the Disney Store &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>Job description..&#8221;Creating Magical Moments for guests of all ages.&#8221; Its been quite a long while since I&#8217;ve created a magical moment for anyone! And I think it might be entirely too peopley there for me. Or at least too many kids.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Entertainer at Land of\u00a0Little Horses &#8211;<\/strong>\u00a0So who do I have to entertain, the horses or the people who come to see them&#8230;job description wasn&#8217;t very clear.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Specimen Collector &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>Yes, that kind of specimen. Really they hire a person just for this job. I thought who ever wasn&#8217;t busy comes and collects it. Guessing most people are too busy&#8230; Who wants THAT job?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Crime Scene Cleaner &#8211;\u00a0<\/strong>\u00a0Just No!<\/p>\n<p>These are some of the weird wacky jobs I&#8217;ve seen listed this week. Stay tuned, if I don&#8217;t find a job there may be more&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>&#8220;The only way to do great work is to love what you do.&#8221; ~ Steve Jobs<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I do know there\u00a0isn&#8217;t one&#8230;but I won&#8217;t be taking any of these&#8230; After losing yet another job I signed up for unemployment until I found the &#8220;perfect job.&#8221; This is much like finding the perfect man&#8230;neither<a class=\"moretag\" href=\"https:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?p=734\">Read More&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":735,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,257],"tags":[454,335,453,455],"class_list":["post-734","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","category-life","tag-funny-jobs","tag-jobs","tag-looking-for-a-job","tag-weird-jobs"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - 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