{"id":791,"date":"2018-07-10T12:35:10","date_gmt":"2018-07-10T16:35:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?p=791"},"modified":"2018-07-10T12:35:10","modified_gmt":"2018-07-10T16:35:10","slug":"i-hate-autocorrect","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?p=791","title":{"rendered":"I HATE Autocorrect!!!"},"content":{"rendered":"

can I tell you how much I hate it…but sometimes it’s funny…<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

\"very<\/a>

it truly makes me want to scream…<\/p><\/div>\n

I needed something to make me laugh today and have been gathering these funny autocorrects for some time now…so thought I would share them with you. I hope you get a chuckle out of them. I think it’s funny how autocorrect has a dark side to it…seems to change things so they sometimes sound dirty…. It must have a sense of humor though as well….Enjoy!<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. I was telling my friends(ok, it just changed that to “feeling” my friends) that the company I was going to be a consultant for was doing purses now too and it changed it to “dong purses”…whatever they are, I don’t want one!<\/li>\n
  2. A friend of mine was saying she was buying her grandsons some socks and it was changed to “I always buy them some dicks.” We still laugh at that one…<\/li>\n
  3. I was worried about a friend and in a 3 way private message to 2 other friends I sent this.. “if I don’t hear from her shortly..I’m eating her.” Well that’ll show her for not getting in touch…<\/li>\n
  4. Another friend was texting us about her husband, Rick and it came up “Stick” instead…he will forever be known as “Stick” now…<\/li>\n
  5. I started a Grief Group so my friends could openly talk about their loved ones in private without feeling judged…although when I texted a friend to ask if she wanted to join it..well, this is what came up. “I have a “Grease Proof.” She asked me what I had that was grease proof?<\/li>\n
  6. Did you ever send a text or private message and it took a little while for the people you sent it too to see the error…and when they did, it was even more hilarious. I sent one to a few friends about something we were all getting…an invite or something and instead of “I got mine”…it said, “I got men.” They were all very happy for me and asked how many I got?<\/li>\n
  7. I said I saw a woman walking her cat on a leash, which was funny in itself… but it was changed to “walking her car on a leash.” Which was even funnier…<\/li>\n
  8. A friend fell and I wanted to text, “Aw, sorry to hear this.” It showed up as “Awesome, sorry to hear this.” At least the sorry to hear this wasn’t changed…<\/li>\n
  9. The other day a lot of people were on FB talking about having problems with their Comcast WIFI. Someone posted…I am still having problems with my “Cervix”…I don’t know that Comcast can fix that…<\/li>\n
  10. I didn’t receive my free donut at Dunkin Donuts on free donut day and texted my grand daughter to say that I was upset with them…I sent this…I am extremely upset with Dunkin Dog Nuts….She sent me a text back and said, \u00a0“what is this place, is it new?”…. I don’t think I want anything from that place though…<\/li>\n
  11. On FB I saw a funny story a woman had posted that her Mother had a health problem and someone asked how she was and the woman replied… Oh she’s fine now..She just needed an “epic penis” (epi pen)… So glad it helped!<\/li>\n
  12. I was texting a few people and said I went to a concert. They asked what concert… “Bonjovially” was my answer… It was a joyful Bon Jovi concert \u00a0though!<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Hope you enjoyed this and maybe got a laugh or two out of them. It did make me smile while I was writing this…Did you ever have one of your texts changed into something funny or not so funny..let me know in the comments..<\/p>\n

    “The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.” ~ e.e. cummings<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

     <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    can I tell you how much I hate it…but sometimes it’s funny… I needed something to make me laugh today and have been gathering these funny autocorrects for some time now…so thought I would share themRead More…<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":792,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,257,8],"tags":[497,495,496,494],"class_list":["post-791","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","category-life","category-rants","tag-autocorrect","tag-autocorrectthis","tag-dont-change-my-words","tag-hateautocorrect"],"yoast_head":"\nI HATE Autocorrect!!! - The Helpful Hellion<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?p=791\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"I HATE Autocorrect!!! 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There are so many things I'm tired of lately, so I decided to write them all down and then burn it..maybe it will make all the things I'm tired of go away...most likely it won't but it will make me feel better\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Aging"","block_context":{"text":"Aging","link":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?cat=215"},"img":{"alt_text":"kitty sleeping","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/pexels-photo-62640.jpeg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/pexels-photo-62640.jpeg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/pexels-photo-62640.jpeg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/pexels-photo-62640.jpeg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":286,"url":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?p=286","url_meta":{"origin":791,"position":5},"title":"My Dad, A Man of Few Words..","author":"Hellion","date":"March 3, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"but the words he spoke left quite an impact Last week was my Dad's birthday, he would have been 89. 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Dad was a strong, quiet,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Humor"","block_context":{"text":"Humor","link":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/?cat=1"},"img":{"alt_text":"Dad%20on%20a%20fighter%20plane","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/Dad20on20a20fighter20plane.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/791","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=791"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/791\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":793,"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/791\/revisions\/793"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/792"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=791"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=791"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/helpfulhellion.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=791"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}